Best Jokes

Where do you find lost silverware?

Answer: At the fork in the road.

I told my brother he was born on the highway.

After all, that’s where most accidents happen.

If you just got an iPhone and are "learning" to text, here is some VERY helpful information. Don't thank me (DTM). This is a public service (TIPS). Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for Senior Discounts this is the code for you.

ATD: At The Doctor's
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!
GHA: Got Heartburn Again
HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.
ROFL... CGU: Rolling On Floor Laughing... And Can't Get Up
SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop
TTYL: Talk To You Louder
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?

I think the rap world may be shrinking...

It used to be The Notorious B.I.G., Big Pun, Big Daddy Kane, and a big list of others...

Now it is Lil Wayne, Lil Bow Wow, Lil Kim and a long little list of other littles.