Best Jokes

At a mental health hospital a psychiatrist sets a test to determine the mental progress of his three top patients. He gets three chairs and repaints them. Before they dry, he re-positions them in a room in such a way that one is in front of the other.

After this, he calls the three patients and asks them to seat down. The first two gladly sit on the wet chairs at the front. However, the third who comes in last takes one look at the wet chair and then proceeds to the corner of the room where there is a pile of papers. He takes one sheet which he drapes on the wet chair before sitting.

Surprised by the action of the third, the doctor asks him why he draped the sheet of paper on the wet chair.

“That's easy," came the reply, "seeing that I am seated at the back, I needed to be a bit raised if I wanted to see what's happening at the front."

How are coffee beans like kids?

They're always getting grounded.

A man goes to his therapist to have a dream interpreted. He tells the doctor that he was dreaming of eating a big meal. A seven course meal. He started with the soup and was going to move onto the salad next.

As he finished his soup and put his spoon down the bowl refilled itself by magic. He again finished the soup and again the bowl refilled itself. Every time he finished the soup and tried to move onto the salad he could not. He asked his doctor what the hidden meaning was.

The doctor's reply, "It only proves that you cannot change courses in the middle of a dream."