Little Susie, a six-year-old, complained, "Mother, I've got a stomach ache."
"That's because your stomach is empty," the mother replied. "You would feel better if you had something in it."
That afternoon, her father came complaining that he had a severe headache all day. Susie perked up. "That's because it's empty," she said. "You'd feel better if you had something in it."
"Doctor, I have an ear ache."
2000 B.C. - "Here, eat this root."
1000 B.C. - "That root is heathen, say this prayer."
1850 A.D. - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion."
1940 A.D. - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill."
1985 A.D. - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic."
2014 A.D. - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!"
At the final stop of a bus line, a reporter is taking a poll. She approaches a man and asks him, "When you are sitting in the bus and an elderly person enters, do you get up and give up your seat?"
The man responds with emphasis, "No way!"
Surprised the reporter asks, "Well, why not?"
The man answers, "I'm the driver."