A hypochondriac told his doctor he was certain he had a fatal disease.
“Nonsense,” scolded the doctor. “You wouldn’t know if you had that. With that particular disease there’s no discomfort of any kind.”
“Oh no!” gasped the patient. “Those are my symptoms exactly.”
A young man was in love with two women and could not decide which of them to marry. Finally he went to a marriage counselor.
When asked to describe his two loves, he noted that one was a great poet and the other made delicious pancakes.
"Oh," said the counselor, "I see what the problem is. You can't decide whether to marry for batter or verse?"