Two students were driving on the highway. Just outside the city limits they saw a sign: "Clean Restrooms."
By the time they got to their destination, they'd cleaned 147 public restrooms.
"King David used to be a hero of mine, but not anymore," said little Brodie to his mother one Sunday, after church.
"Why not, son?"
"I learned today that he killed the Jolly Green Giant."
What do you call a round, green vegetable that breaks out of prison?
Nuts are so expensive now-a-days...
They cost you an ALM-OND a LEG!