Latest Jokes

GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they are sure you are not raising them right.

HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

IMPREGNABLE: a women whose memory of labor is still vivid.

INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

OW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.

Baloney \ba-lo’-ne\: Where some hemlines fall.

Banquet \bang’-kwit\: Why the vocalist had no instrumentalists.

Bernadette \burn’-a-det\: The act of torching a mortgage.

Boomerang \boo’-me-rang\: What’s on top of the Ghost Cream Pie.

My paper got ripped earlier...

I'm still torn up about it!

There was this lady who was visiting a church one Sunday. The sermon seemed to go on forever, and many in the congregation were dozing off.

After the service, she walked up to a very sleepy-looking gentleman, extended her hand in greeting, and said, "Hello, I'm Gladys Dunn."

And the gentleman replied, "You're not the only one, ma'am, I'm glad it's done too!"