Latest Jokes

As the only vegetarian in the family, the mother of the house often gets tired of defending her food choices to other family members. She didn't realize how often the subject is actually discussed until one day, when she picked up her six-year-old, Jordan, from school. His class had made chickens using potatoes and paper feathers.

Jordan proudly presented his little project, announcing excitedly, "Mom, we finally have the kind of meat even you can eat!"

The 50-50-90 rule:

If you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right...

There’s a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

It was Palm Sunday but because of a sore throat, 5-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm fronds. Johnny asked them what they were for.

"People held them over Jesus' head as he walked by," his father told him.

"Wouldn't you know it," Johnny fumed, "the one Sunday I don't go and He shows up!"

Teacher: Johnny what time is bedtime at your house?

Johnny: 8:30 PM, ma’am.

A few moments later

Johnny’s Best Friend: So what time did you go to sleep last night?

Johnny: 1:00 AM, after watching two movies and getting a snack.