animal jokes

Category: "Animal Jokes"
2 votes

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray this cushy life to keep.
I pray for toys that look like mice,
And sofa cushions, soft and nice.

I pray for gourmet kitty snacks,
And someone nice to scratch my back,
For windowsills all warm and bright,
For shadows to explore at night.

I pray I'll always stay real cool
And keep the secret feline rule
To never tell a human that
The world is really ruled by cats!

2 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
3 votes

It doesn't take 45 minutes to get a dog ready to go outside in the winter.

Dogs cannot lie.

Dogs never resist nap time.

You don't need to get extra phone lines for a dog.

Dogs don't pester you about getting a kid.

Dogs don't care if the peas have been touched by the mashed potatoes.

Dogs are housebroken by the time they are 12 weeks old.

Your dog is not embarrassed if you sing in public.

Average cost of sending a dog to school: $42

Average cost of sending a kid: $103,000

3 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "merk" |
6 votes

Two cows were looking over a gate. One said to the other, "What do you think about this mad cow disease?"

The other cow looked over and replied, "Why should I care, I'm a helicopter..."

6 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |
4 votes

Two chickens were at a crossroad. One road led to KFC and the other one led to Popeyes.

The two chickens decided to part ways. The chicken that went to KFC was killed immediately. The chicken that went to Popeyes was left alone.

He forgot to bring his own bun.

4 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "LasVegasChic" |