animal jokes

A couple from the east decided to vacation out west and visited a dude ranch. During the stay the tenderfoot felt that he had observed the horse riders and would be able to ride one himself. He mounted the horse and a moment later painfully picked himself out of the dust in one corner of the corral.

"Man, oh man," he said. "She sure bucked something fierce!"

"Bucked," said a nearby cowpoke, "Rats, she just coughed."

A man bought a mousetrap. When he brought it home, he discovered that he had no cheese to bait it with. So he found a picture of some cheese and put the picture in the trap.

The next morning he went to the trap to see if it had caught anything. The picture of the cheese was gone. In its place was a picture of a mouse.

A cowboy was leading a flock of sheep down Main Street when he was ordered to stop by the town policeman.

“What’s wrong?” the cowboy asked. “I was just heading my ewes into a side street.”

“That’s the trouble,” the policeman replied. “No ewe turns permitted on Main Street!”

A fisherman carrying a lobster bumped into a friend on the way home.

“Where are you going with the lobster under your arm?” asked his friend.

The fisherman answered, “I’m taking him home to dinner.”

Just then the lobster spoke up, “I’ve already had my dinner, can we go to a movie instead?”