elderly jokes

Category: "Elderly Jokes"
3 votes

I ask my 85 year old grandpa to what he attributes his long life.

His answer... BREATHING!

3 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "barber7796" |
$10.00 won 4 votes

"I think grandpa mistook his smart phone for an empty glass of wine."

"Why do you say that?"

"He just threw it in the fireplace."

4 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Marty" |
0 votes

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Both could barely see over the dashboard. Cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought, "I must be losing my mind. I swear we just went through a red light."

A few minutes later, they came to another intersection, and the light was red again. Again, they went right through. This time, the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was mistaken. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the next intersection to see what was going on.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red, and yet they went right through. She turned to the woman driving and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row! You could have killed us!"

Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh, am I driving?"

0 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "CPipe" |
0 votes

Senior citizens have taken to texting with gusto. They even have their own vocabulary:

BFF: Best Friend Fainted
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered by Medicare
FWB: Friend with Beta-blockers
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!

0 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |