elderly jokes

Category: "Elderly Jokes"
2 votes

Took my 72 year old father to have his eyes checked. That's when we realized his eyes were just fine.

He was ask to read the characters on the bottom line. His reply: M-A-D-E- I-N- C-H-I-N-A

2 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "shopin55" |
0 votes

A senior couple pulls up to a rest stop to get something to eat.

Waiter: "How may I help you?"

Elderly Man: "Two hamburgers, please."

Elderly Lady: "What did he say?"

Elderly Man [yelling]: "He asked what we wanted and I told him 'Two hamburgers'!"

Waiter: "So, where are you heading?"

Elderly Man: "To Chicago to see our grandchildren."

Elderly Lady: "What did he say?"

Elderly Man [yelling]: "He asked where we're going. I told him we're going to see the grandkids!"

Waiter: "It sure is a nice day for a drive."

Elderly Man: "Yes, it's been quite pleasant."

Elderly Lady: "What did he say?"

Elderly Man [yelling]: "He said it's good weather!"

Waiter: "Where are you coming from?"

Elderly Man: "We started our trip from Pittsburgh."

Elderly Lady: "What did he say?"

Elderly Man [yelling]: "He asked where we're from and I said Pittsburgh!"

Waiter: "I dated a girl from Pittsburgh once. She wouldn't shut up and couldn't cook if her life depended on it."

Elderly Lady: "What did he say?"

Elderly Man [yelling]: "He says he knows you!"

0 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
$6.00 won 4 votes

(Me) Now that I’m retired I finally have my very own 'Command Center'!

(Wife) It looks like a lazy boy recliner, a TV remote and a half eaten bag of Cheetos on an end table to me!

(Me) It’s a clandestine operation so don’t tell anyone!

(Wife) Don’t worry I won’t tell a soul! Just to clear things up though, is the arm chair law practice and the sports announcing gig a secret too?

4 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Marty" |
1 votes

I was watching the Super Bowl with my ninety two year old grandfather. One team scored a touchdown. They showed the instant replay. He thought they scored another one...

I was gonna tell him, but the game he was watching was better.

1 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "D-Gellybean" |