A child comes home from his first day at school.
His mother asks, "Well, what did you learn today?"
The kid replies, "Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow."
A junior-high student was studying astronomy and enjoying it greatly.
One morning at breakfast she mentioned, "On Friday we're having a quiz on the moon."
Her little brother piped up, "Are you gonna let her go, Mom???"
In high school, two boys, two friends (one Spanish and one American), were talking about the grades they received in their classes.
American boy: "You got an F in Spanish! How could that happen? Spanish is what you speak at home and stuff."
Spanish boy: "Probably the same way you got an F in English."
When my son graduated from high school, he had to give a speech. He began by reading from his prepared text.
"I want to talk about my mother and the wonderful influence she has had on my life," he told the audience. "She is a shining example of parenthood, and I love her more than words could ever do justice."
At this point he seemed to struggle for words. After a pause, he looked up with a sly grin and said, "Sorry, but it's really hard to read my mother's handwriting."