What is the most tired part of a car?
What else, the exhaust pipe!
When a neighbor's home was burglarized, I decided to be more safety conscious. But my measly front-door lock wasn’t going to stop anyone, so I hung this sign outside: "Nancy, don’t come in. The snake is loose. Mom."
Little Johnny's teacher was preparing the students for the upcoming Spelling Bee when she asked Johnny to "Spell Straight."
Little Johnny: "S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T."
Teacher: "Correct; what does it mean?"
Little Johnny: "Without ginger ale."