Best Jokes

Claude, the invisible man, was low on funds and started job prospecting. His employment agency called him into their office with a job opportunity.

"I think this would be a great job for you," said the counselor. "A mirror salesman."

"I don't know," Claude replied. "I just can't see myself doing that."

A gynecologist who had lost interest in his medical practice decided to change careers and enrolled in auto mechanic school.

He performed well in the course but was still shocked when he got an off-the-chart 200 on his final exam. He asked the instructor to explain the grade.

"I gave you 50 points for taking the engine apart correctly," the teacher said, "50 points for putting it back together correctly, and an extra 100 points for doing it all through the muffler."

What did the shark say to the clam when it would not share its candy?

Why are you so shellfish?

Q: What's the difference between being in prison and being a corporate employee?
A: In prison you get free health care.