Best Jokes

1 votes

Pulling into the crowded parking lot at the shopping center, I rolled down the car windows to make sure my puppy had fresh air. She was stretched full out on the back seat and I wanted to impress upon her that she must remain there.

I walked to the curb backward, pointing my finger at the car and saying emphatically, "Now you stay. Do you hear me? "Stay! Stay!"

The driver of a nearby car gave me a strange look and said, "Why don't you just put it in park?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Uwens Pomeroy" |
$5.00 won 1 votes

Five year old Little Frankie got a new pair of shoes. His father said, "Frankie you can't get in the mud puddles with these new shoes."

Frankie's father watches as Frankie bounds out the front door, goes to the nearest large mud puddle and stomps in many times. Frankie runs back into the house with a grin from ear to ear proclaiming, "Oh yes, you can!"

1 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Marty" |
1 votes

"I shall have to put you fellows in the same room," said the hotel keeper.

"That's all right," the guests replied.

"Well, I think," said the host, "you'll have a comfortable night. It's a featherbed."

At two o'clock in the morning one of the guests awoke his companion.

"Change places with me, Dick," he groaned. "It's my turn to lie on the feather."

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Arthur Art Will Williams" |
1 votes

A customer sat down at a table in a smart restaurant and tied a napkin around his neck. The scandalized manager called a waiter and instructed him, "Try to make him understand, as tactfully as possible, that that's not done."

Said the thoughtful waiter to the customer: "Pardon me, sir, shave or haircut?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Arthur Art Will Williams" |