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Favorite this joke I was swimming in the ocean and my dentures fell out...
But it's okay, it was only in-sea-dental.
Not only did my girlfriend not want to join me trekking the Appellation Trail, she didn’t want to be apart for 41 days this summer.
After some back and forth on the subject she finally gave me the go ahead. Upon my return I found out she had a new boyfriend.
I don’t understand why, after all I distinctly remember her telling me to “Take a Hike!”
Those who aspire toward universal good may dream a hero’s death...
However, statistically speaking there’s a better chance they’ll choke and be taken out by a chicken nugget.
In a local restaurant a waitress offered the patron a cup of coffee. He refused, pointed a finger at her and said, "Young lady, don't you know that every single person who drinks coffee dies?"
Flustered, she said, "Really?"
Another customer said, "Hey, Mister. Don't scare the young lady like that. Everyone who does NOT drink coffee dies, too."
"I know," said the first patron. I am studying to be a politician. Half truths, even if what I said is the whole truth, is good enough."
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