There are only two things in the world that a child will willingly share...
A communicable diseases and mom's age.
Patient: "It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable."
Doctor: "Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you?"
Patient: "I sure did. The bottle said 'keep tightly closed'."
Patient: Doctor I think I've been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this water.
Patient: Will this make me feel better?
Doctor: No, but I'll be able to see leaks and know where the vampire bit you.
"Well, what seems to be the problem?" asked the clock repair man.
"It's my grandfather clock. It used to go tic toc, tic toc, tic toc. Now, it just goes tic, tic, tic, tic, tic," replied the young lady.
"Hmmm, I think I can fix this," he says. He opens the door on the clock, looks at it, and then says to the lady, "Don't worry, we have ways of making it toc!"