Best Jokes

Your HR department just sent an email for your open-enrollment period for health-care. There is a new option that's more expensive, but has been getting great response:

For longer term illnesses and PTSD, your plan will pay all expenses to fly to, and stay in, the Caribbean Islands, with a high deductible your kids will be paying for in 40 years.

It's called, "BAHAMA-CARE!"

Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.

Where would Voldemort go if he played the saxophone?

Jazzkaban.

An airplane pilot had had a particularly difficult flight and a rough landing.

The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile and give them a "Thanks for riding Royal Airlines." But, in light of his bad landing, the pilot had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment.

Finally, everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?"

"Why no, ma'am," replied the pilot, "What is it?"

The little old lady said, "Did we land or were we shot down?"