Where would Voldemort go if he played the saxophone?
Jazzkaban.
An airplane pilot had had a particularly difficult flight and a rough landing.
The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile and give them a "Thanks for riding Royal Airlines." But, in light of his bad landing, the pilot had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment.
Finally, everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?"
"Why no, ma'am," replied the pilot, "What is it?"
The little old lady said, "Did we land or were we shot down?"
While away from home in college I wrote a letter to my dad.
It said: "No mun, no fun, your loving son."
He wrote back saying: "Too bad, so sad, your loving dad."