Best Jokes

A drunk stumbled out the door of the bar. He stood on the corner waiting for the light. He wife calls and asks if he is drunk. The man replies, "Of course not!"

Being suspicious that he is drunk, she says, "Okay then, tell me where you are and I will come and get you."

The drunk replies, "I am at the corner of WALK and DON'T WALK!"

I asked my therapist what I could do about my fear of hugging.

She said, "Embrace it."

If you’re feeling down, try drinking a pint of water before going to bed.

It’ll give you a reason to get up in the morning.

Our generation never got a break. When we were young they taught us to respect our elders...

Now that we are older, they tell us to listen to the youth of the country.