Best Jokes

My girlfriend isn't talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday.

Not sure how I did that...

I didn't even know it was her birthday!

Two mountaineers reached a huge, deep fissure in a glacier.

"Careful here," says one of them. "My mountain guide fell down there last year."

"I bet you felt bad about that," says the other.

He quipped, "Not really, it was pretty old and missing a few pages."