Why doesn't the ocean leak?
Because it has Seals.
This new technology is for the birds!
I sure do miss those good old reliable manual typewriters...
Those things didn’t make nearly as many typing mistakes!
A young man called directory assistance. "Hello, operator, I would like the telephone number for Mary Jones in Phoenix, Arizona."
"There are multiple listings for Mary Jones in Phoenix," the operator replied. "Do you have a street name?"
The young man hesitated, and then said, "Well, most people call me Ice Man."
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with wearing different clothes every half an hour.
I said, “Wait, I can change!”