Best Jokes

$7.00 won 3 votes

Teacher: If two people told you they walked five miles in a straight line into a desert how many miles would they have walked together?

Little Johnny: They would have walked 10 miles together.

Teacher: That isn’t correct Johnny, they walked 5 miles together, so the answer is 5 miles and not a combined total of 10 miles.

Little Johnny, nope, it’s 10 miles and I’ll betcha a buck.

Teacher: You’re on! Now explain to the class how you arrived at 10 total miles. BTW, I’ll let you off the hook for the dollar.

Little Johnny: You said two people told me they told me they’d walked in a straight line five miles into the desert. How could they have told me this unless they walked backed? That’s ten miles in my book and I’m not letting you off the hook, change will be fine.

3 votes

posted by "Marty" |
3 votes

Elf: "Santa, we have finished making mints for every child."

Santa: "Mints?"

Elf: "Yeah, you said make Altoids."

Santa: "I said make all toys."

Elf: "Altoids!"

Santa: "All toys."

Elf: "Well this is a disappoint-mint."

3 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "eslippin" |
3 votes

Customer: Waiter, I’m hungry. Please bring me a mashed potato sandwich on rye.

Waiter: What are you saying? Only an idiot would order mashed potatoes on rye bread.

Customer: You’re right. Make it on whole wheat toast.

3 votes

CATEGORY Food Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
$8.00 won 3 votes

Do you know why the banana put aloe vera on its sunburn?

Because it was peeling.

3 votes

CATEGORY Food Jokes
posted by "Rolley Marvel" |