Two young lady friends hadn't seen each other in a long time and decided to meet for lunch. Their conversation got around to their respective love lives.
Marcy confessed there really wasn't anyone in her life at the moment. Heather started smiling like crazy when talking about her new beau. "He's perfect. He's so sweet. Then last night he said those four little words I've been waiting to hear."
"What? He asked you to marry him?" Marcy asked.
Heather said, "No, he said 'put your money away.'"
The more I study,
The more I know.
The more I know,
The more I forget.
The more I forget,
The less I know.
So why study?
Husband and wife were golfing when suddenly the wife asked, “Honey, if I died, would you get married again?”
The husband said, “No sweetie.”
The woman said, “I’m sure you would.”
So the man said, “Okay, I would.”
Then the woman asked, “Would you let her sleep in our bed?”
And the man replied, “Ya, I guess so.”
Then the wife asked, “Would you let her use my golf clubs?”
And the husband replied, “No, she’s left handed.”
I have finally made it to those wonder years you hear about while growing up.
I wonder where my glasses are...
I wonder where my car is parked...
I wonder where my cell phone is...
I wonder where my sunglasses are...
I wonder...