Best Jokes

3 votes

One month into Marine Corps training in San Diego, California, we were preparing for a ten-mile march in 100-degree weather when a jeep drove up with a large radio in the back.

"Who knows anything about radios?" our drill instructor asked.

Several hands went up, and anticipating a ride in the jeep, recruits began listing their credentials. Everything from a degree in communications to a part-time job in a repair shop was declared.

The DI listened to all the contenders, then pointed to the most qualified. "You!" he barked. "Carry the radio."

3 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$50.00 won 3 votes

I ordered new coats for my kids...

For convenience, I had them shipped directly to their school’s lost and found section.

3 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "nerdasaurus" |
$15.00 won 3 votes

At what age did Chuck Norris lose his virginity?

Trick question.

Chuck Norris never loses.

3 votes

posted by "aod318" |
$25.00 won 3 votes

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.

The frog hopped into the princesses lap and said: "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am, and then my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so."

That night, the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sautéed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and shallot cream sauce.

3 votes

posted by "merk" |