Latest Jokes

I wish working out was like taxes...

You suck it up, do it once...

And then you’re good for a year!

I was getting into my car when I noticed a dent. On the windshield was a note and a phone number from the driver. "I feel terrible," the woman apologized when I called. "I hit your car as I was pulling into the next parking spot."

"Please, don't worry," I said to her. "I'm sure our insurance companies will take care of everything."

"Thank you for your understanding," she said. "You're so much nicer than the man I hit on the way out."

My neighbor, a tailor, has a new job.

I asked him how much he enjoyed it.

"It's Sew-Sew."

A computer-illiterate called the help desk asking how to change her password.

“Okay,” I said, after punching in a few keys. “Log in using the password 123456.”

“Is that all in caps?” she asked.