Latest Jokes

$15.00 won 7 votes

The person sitting next to me on a flight was a woman. Ever the charmer, I used one of my pick-up lines on her.

I asked, “Does the airline charge you extra for sitting next to good-looking men?”

“Yes,” she replied, “but I wasn’t willing to pay.”

7 votes

CATEGORY Pickup Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "srg" |
$15.00 won 8 votes

I discussed peer pressure and cigarettes with my 12-year-old daughter. Having struggled for years to quit, I described how I had started smoking to “be cool”.

As I outlined the arguments kids might make to tempt her to try it, she stopped me mid-lecture, saying, “Hey, I’ll just tell them my mom smokes. How cool can it be?”

8 votes

CATEGORY Kid Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "stee" |
$12.00 won 6 votes

My friend Kimberly announced that she had started a diet to lose some pounds she had put on recently.

“Good!” I exclaimed. “I’m ready to start a diet too. We can be dieting buddies and help each other out. When I feel the urge to drive out and get a burger and fries, I’ll call you first.”

“Great!” she replied. “I’ll ride with you.”

6 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "stee" |
$25.00 won 8 votes

A friend of mine had resisted efforts to get him to run with our jogging group until his doctor told him he had to exercise. Soon thereafter, he reluctantly joined us for our 5:30 am jogs on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.

After a month of running, we decided that my friend might be hooked, especially when he said he had discovered what “runner’s euphoria” was.

“Runner’s euphoria,” he explained, “is what I feel at 5:30 am on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays.”

8 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "stee" |