A father was buying bass lessons for his son. After the 1st week the father asked him what he had learned. The son said, "On my 1st lesson we learned about the E string."
The 2nd week came and after the lesson the father asked what had he learned that week. The son said, "On the 2nd lesson I learned about the A string."
The 3rd week came by and the father said to his son, "You know these are expensive lessons, what have you learned this week?"
The son said, "I quit the lessons, I already got a gig."
There were two young men from the South who loved to fish and they wanted to do some ice fishing. They’d heard about it up in Canada, so they took off up there. The lake was frozen nicely. They stopped just before they got to the lake at a little bait shop and got all their tackle. One of them said, “We’re gonna need an ice pick.” So they got that, and they took off.
In about two hours, one of them was back at the shop and said, “We’re gonna need another dozen ice picks.”
Well, the fellow in the shop wanted to ask some questions, but he didn’t. He sold him the picks, and the young man left. In about an hour, he was back.
“We’re gonna need all the ice picks you’ve got.”
The bait man couldn’t stand it any longer. “By the way,” he asked, “how are you fellows doing out there?”
“Not very well at all,” he said. “We ain’t even got the boat in the water yet."