Latest Jokes

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Two rules to success in life...

1. Don't tell people everything you know.

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posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
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Fred: "Do you think I have any brains at all?"

John: "Well, how can I put this nicely, I can describe it best like this... If they were to take your brain, roll it into a little ball and roll it down the edge of a razor blade, it would look like a BB rolling down an eight lane freeway."

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CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Douglas" |
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TEACHER: How many feet are there in a yard?

STUDENT: It depends. If there are 3 people, then we have six feet!

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CATEGORY School Jokes
posted by "Fube Hyceinth" |
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A husband went to the police station to file a "missing person" report for his missing wife...

Husband: I lost my wife, she went shopping & hasn't come back yet!

Inspector: What is her height?

Husband: I never checked, she's five feet something...

Inspector: Slim or healthy?

Husband: Not slim, she can be healthy.

Inspector: Color of eyes?

Husband: Never noticed.

Inspector: Color of hair?

Husband: Changes according to season.

Inspector: What was she wearing?

Husband: Not sure. It may have been a suit or maybe shorts.

Inspector: Was she driving?

Husband: Yes.

Inspector: Tell me what kind of car she was driving?

Husband: A black 2015 Corvette Z06, with supercharged 6.2 liter V8 engine generating 625 horse power teamed with an eight-speed track certified HD automatic transmission with paddle shifters and a removable carbon fiber roof pan!

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CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |