Latest Jokes

4 votes
 

A long time ago, a father, visiting America for the very first time, went up and down the aisles with his son-in-law at the local store.

He constantly asked questions about products he saw, "Vas diss? Powdered orange juice?"

"Yeah, Dad. You just add a little water, and you have fresh orange juice."

A few minutes later, in a different aisle, "Und vas dis? Powdered milk?"

"Yeah, Dad. You just add a little water, and you have fresh milk!"

A few minutes later, in a different aisle, "Und give a look here! Baby Powder! Vat a country, vat a country!"

4 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
2 votes

After eating his entire meal, an elderly man motioned for the server. When the server approached him, he asked for the manager. He explained he would not pay for the meal.

The manager responded by contacting the police. When the police arrived, they heard the complaint. They responded to the senior, "You need to pay for your meal, Sir."

The man vehemently refused to pay. The frustrated police officer said, "But you ate the entire meal?"

The old man yelled back, "I kept hoping the next bite would be better."

2 votes

CATEGORY Food Jokes
posted by "RTMartin" |
2 votes

An old woman goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse she has been living with for the last 40 years.

The Wizard says, "Perhaps, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."

The old woman says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."

2 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
3 votes
rating rating rating rating rating
 

A man weaving up to a local bar orders a whiskey. The bartender Joe, noticing the condition of Tony, says, "I can't serve you Tony, you have had too much to drink."

Tony walks around the block and comes in the side door and orders a whiskey. Joe again says, "You have had too much already. I can't serve you."

Tony walks the block again and comes in the back door and orders a whiskey and before Joe has a chance to refuse him the drink, Tony says, "Hey Joe! How many places do you work at?"

3 votes

posted by "jim larkin" |