Latest Jokes

$15.00 won 4 votes

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.

2. The farm was used to produce produce.

3. The dump was so full it had to refuse more refuse.

4. We must polish the Polish furniture.

5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7. Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10. I did not object to the object.

11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12. There was a row among the oarsmen on how to row.

13. They were too close to the door to close it.

14. The buck does funny things when does are present.

15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.

19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

4 votes

Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "Leibel" |
$10.00 won 4 votes

What's your favorite book?

My husband's checkbook.

4 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "ajokes" |
0 votes
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I told my friend I wanted to join the military. My friend told me that the coast guard wouldn’t take me because I’m not six feet tall.

"Why does a person need to be six feet tall?" I asked.

He said, "That way if your boat goes down you can wade to shore."

0 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "Marty" |
0 votes

The Parish father passed away. He left two hundred dollars to each nun in his will. The nuns were each deciding how best to serve others with the money they had received. Sister Mary Catherine noticed a man in tattered clothing sitting on the curb across the street. She walked up to the man, handed him the 200 dollars and said, “God's Speed.”

A week later a well dressed man came to the Parish and asked for Sister Mary Catherine. She soon arrived and noticed it was the very man she had given the two hundred dollars. The man handed her a fist full of cash and said, "Here's your share! I went to the track as you suggested and God's Speed took first place at twenty eight to one."

0 votes

posted by "Marty" |