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Favorite this joke Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"
Two women who had just met at a health spa were talking about their lifestyles and how they hope to stay healthy. One asked the other to detail her daily routine.
“I eat moderately,” she replied, “I exercise moderately, I drink moderately, and I live moderately.”
“Is there anything else you do?” her new friend asked.
“Yes,” she said, “I lie extensively.”
I went to a speciality shop to buy a bra for my wife
The clerk said he needed to know something about her before making a suggestion for instance: We have a Presbyterian bra that is firm and supportive. We have the Salvation Army bra that is warm and uplifting.
The clerk asked me do you understand? I said yes she is Jewish, small busted and always finding fault with me.
You need the Jewish bra. It makes mountains out of mole hills
I got robbed at the gas station today. I called the cops and they asked if I knew who did it.
I said, "Yes, pump number six."
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