Latest Jokes

$50.00 won 8 votes

My friend came back from Las Vegas once. He told me the slot machines are easy to win big at.

He went to town in a $10,000 Nissan, left in a $360,000 Porsche. 

I thought, "Nice, I'm going to get in on that." So I left for Vegas in my $15,000 Toyota. Came back in a $800,000 vehicle. 

A Greyhound bus.

8 votes

Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "barber7796" |
$10.00 won 5 votes

The percussionist, tired of being teased by her band-mates, decides to switch instruments.

She walks into the local music shop, points to her choices and says, “I’ll take that trumpet and that accordion.”

The shop assistant looks at her for a second and replies, “Okay, you can take the fire extinguisher, but the radiator’s not for sale.”

5 votes

CATEGORY Musician Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "barber7796" |
$9.00 won 3 votes

A wife served some homemade cinnamon rolls for breakfast and waited eagerly for her husband’s reaction.

When none was immediately forthcoming, she asked, “If I baked these commercially, how much do you think I could get for one of them?”

Without looking up from his newspaper, he replied, “About ten years.”

3 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Karen Carpenter Fan" |
$9.00 won 5 votes

I went on a date with a girl who said she loved animals.

I said, "I work with animals every day."

She said, "That's so sweet. What do you do?"

I replied, "I'm a butcher!"

We never went on a second date.

5 votes

Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Gegg Smith" |