A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”
Why do cowboys need two spurs?
Are they afraid one side of the horse might take off galloping by itself?
I have a pet who is a continual source of personal annoyance and irritation. Truth be told, he really bothers the heck out of me.
I named my pet, "Peeve."
Mama bear, papa bear, and baby bear were having a great time chasing vacationers in a car as they were visiting Yellowstone National Park.
"Yes, Baby Bear?"
"I think we could be doing a better job of scaring these vacationers."
"But Baby Bear," Mama Bear injected. "What more can we do?"
"Maybe we'd have more of an effect on them if we got out of this car and started chasing them on all fours!"