animal jokes

I saw some footage from Scotland showing the Loch Ness monster actually posting something on MySpace.

It is obviously a fraud. NO ONE uses MySpace anymore.

A happily married man had only one complaint, his wife was always nursing sick birds. One cold evening, he came home to find a raven with a splint on its beak sitting in his favorite chair.

On the dining room table there was a feverish eagle pecking at an aspirin while in the kitchen his wife was comforting a shivering little wren that she found.

The furious spouse strode over to where his wife was toweling down the cold little bird.

"I can't take it any more! We've got to get rid of all of these darn..."

The wife held up her hand to cut him off in mid-curse. "Please dear," she said, "not in front of the chilled wren."

How does a firefly feel when it loses its glow?

De-lighted!

To stop King Kong's rampage, the U.S. Army got their top strategists together and came up with a terrific plan.

They built a massive catapult engine, loaded a 1966 Volkswagen in it, and hurled the vehicle directly at the side of the giant ape's head.

In other words, they put a bug in his ear.