animal jokes

Daisy and Bullett, two horses, were talking. "Woe is me!" said Daisy.

"Why so glum, chum?" asked Bullett.

"I really don't feel that down," Daisy replied. "It's just that my owner, Roy, keeps reinforcing affliction and distress upon me. It happens every time we hit the trail."

"I think you're imagining things, " countered Bullett.

"Here comes Roy now, for a ride. I'll prove it to you." Daisy trots off with Roy on his back. They run a half mile or so, then turn around. As they rounded the corner towards Bullett's pen, he heard Roy yell, "Whoa, Daisy, whoa!"

"What'd I tell you?" Daisy shouted to Bullett. "Woe is me!"

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?

I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, "Oh my, I could be eating a slow learner..."

Two mice scavenging in an old studio warehouse find some old celluloid film.

Mouse 1: This looks really old! I wonder what film it is?

Mouse 2: The can is right here... Oh, it's "Gone with the Wind"!

Mouse 1: Well, maybe it's still good - let me take a bite.

Mouse 2: Well? How is it?

Mouse 1: Nothing much. The book was better.