If you told a cow a really funny joke, could she laugh so hard milk would come out her nose?
A farmer asked the vet to come out to check on his favorite bull who wasn't doing well at all. After checking the bull's vital signs, the vet reached in his black bag and pulled out a rather large pill.
He forced open the bull's mouth and crammed the pill down his gullet. Suddenly the bull jumped up and took off like a banshee, jumping every fence in his way.
The vet exclaimed, "Well, looks like your bull is healed!"
The farmer replied, "Now give me one of those pills. I've gotta catch him!"
While at the dinosaur exhibit in Disney’s Animal Kingdom park, I overheard a confused woman complaining to her friend.
She said, "How could they possibly know the names of all those dinosaurs if they died 75 million years ago? And another thing, how do we even know they were called dinosaurs?"
The week we got our puppy, I caught a stomach bug and stayed home from work one day. That afternoon, my wife called to check up on me.
"I’m okay," I said. "But guess who pooped in the dining room?"
My wife’s response, "Who?"