doctor jokes

The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly."

On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?"

"Yes" the mother answered.

"And how is your son now?" he asked.

"Eh, who cares?" she replied.

I went to my Doctor and he suggested I do some exercises. Here is my new regiment...

1. Jump to conclusions
2. Climb the walls
3. Drag my heels
4. Push my luck
5. Make mountains out of molehills
6. Bend over backwards
7. Run in circles
8. Put my foot in my mouth

My therapist thinks I have a preoccupation with vengeance...

We will see about that!

What do you call a clumsy ophthalmologist?

An Eye Dropper