doctor jokes

My therapist thinks I have a preoccupation with vengeance...

We will see about that!

What do you call a clumsy ophthalmologist?

An Eye Dropper

I went to the Doctor for my annual check up.

He told me that I have insomnia.

But I'm not going to lose any sleep over it.

I was getting ready for a doctor's appointment and remembered how my mother once told me, "An apple a day, keeps the doctor away."

Taking her words to heart I decided to bring an apple. Needless to say, it was shot day, I didn't like needles and was thinking, "There must be some way out of this?"

So without thinking, I threw my apple at the doctor. He hasn't spoken to me since.