doctor jokes

I went to the doctor the other day. She told me that I needed to get some exercise. So I went to McDonald's.

My wife wanted to know why I went there. I told her the doctor told me to get some extra fries.

She made me an appointment with a hearing doctor.

Doctor: “I’ve found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem.”

Patient: “Great, how often do I have to take it?”

Doctor: “Every two hours.”

Patient to his doctor: "I have forgotten so many things lately, and it’s getting worse. What can I do?"

Doctor: "Yes, this is a known illness, unfortunately it has no cure. On that note, I'd like to remind you about the $800 that you owe me."

Robert to Doctor: “Doctor, I have a serious problem. I dream of football matches every night."

Doctor: "Don’t worry. I will cure it right now. Take this pill and you will be alright.”

Robert: "Doctor, would it be okay to wait and take the pill tomorrow?”

Doctor: “Why?”

Robert: “Doc, today is the final match. I have to see the season through and know which team is going to win it all!”