Pirate: I have moles on me back aaarrrghh.
Doc: It's ok, they're benign.
Pirate: Count again, I think there be ten!
What do you say to your sister when she's crying?
"Are you having a crisis?"
How many bones are in a human hand?
Just spent $300 on a limousine and discovered that the fee doesn't include a driver...
Can’t believe I’ve spent all that money and have nothing to chauffeur it!