Little Anne came running into the house after the school one day, shouting, "Daddy! Daddy! I got 100 in school today!"
"That's great sweetheart!" said her daddy.
"Come into the living room and tell me about it," daddy continued.
Little Anne said, "Well, I got 50 in spelling, 30 in math and 20 in science."
"What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.
"He's a magician, ma'am" said Little Johnny.
"How interesting. What's his favorite trick?"
"He saws people in half."
"Wow! Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?"
"One half brother and two half sisters."
At the end of last semester, a fellow student complained about how he failed the English course.
The teacher invited him to write a formal letter of complaint to the principal.
I glanced at his letter to see how it was going.
His first sentence read, "Dear Principle, it is infair and unposible that I faled english."