school jokes

Category: "School Jokes"
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I’ll do algebra, I’ll do statistics, I’ll even do trigonometry…

But graphing, THAT is where I draw the line!

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CATEGORY School Jokes
posted by "ERS" |
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A first grade teacher collected old, well-known proverbs. She gave each kid in her class the first half of a proverb, and had them come up with the rest. Here are the results:

* Better be safe than ... Punch a 5th Grader.

* It's always darkest before ... Daylight saving time.

* You can lead a horse to water, but ... How?

* You can't teach an old dog ... Math.

* Love all, trust ... Me.

* The pen is mightier than the ... Pigs.

* You get out of something what you ... See pictured on the box.

* When the blind leadeth the blind ... Get out of the way.

* There is no fool like ... Aunt Eddie.

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CATEGORY School Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
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What do you call a stoner who is completing their PhD?

A Hypothesis

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CATEGORY School Jokes
posted by "zieglarnatta" |
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The following was the answering machine message for an elementary school:

"Hello! You have reached your child's elementary school. In order to assist you in connecting the right staff member, please listen to all your options before making a selection:

To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1.

To make excuses for why your child did not do his work - Press 2.

To complain about what we do - Press 3.

To cuss out staff members - Press 4.

To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you - Press 5.

If you want us to raise your child - Press 6.

If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7.

To request another teacher for the third time this year - Press 8.

To complain about bus transportation - Press 9.

To complain about school lunches - Press 0.

If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable/responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework, and that it's not the teachers fault for your child(ren)'s lack of effort, hang up, and have a nice day!"

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CATEGORY School Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |