Two young soldiers were exchanging their experiences of the service in the Army.
"My sergeants are wonderful", said one soldier.
"I wish I could say the same about mine," said the other.
"You could if you could lie as I do."
The homework assignment for my Spanish class was to write a paragraph. When I returned their papers, I asked one student if he had used Google Translate or any other online translator to write his paper.
He categorically denied doing so.
That led to my next question, “Then why is this in French?”
Doctor, Doctor I think I need glasses.
You certainly do, Sir, this is a fish and chip shop!!
Why did the teddy bear skip lunch?
Because he was stuffed!!