Best Jokes

7 votes

My 90-year-old dad was giving a talk at our local library about his World War II experiences.

During the question-and-answer period, he was asked, “How did you know the war was over?”

He replied, “They stopped shooting at me.”

7 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
posted by "sravanthi" |
$50.00 won 7 votes

A guy, desperate for a drink walks into a candy store. He looks around and after a while the storekeeper says, "Can I help you with anything?"

The guy replies, "Yeah, I really need a drink! Got any liquor?"

"Well, I'm not sure but there is this here," replies the storekeeper.

"What is that?"

"It's liquor-ish"

7 votes

Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Danny Jackson" |
$25.00 won 7 votes

Walking through the hallways at the middle school where I work, I saw a new substitute teacher standing outside his classroom with his forehead against a locker. I heard him mutter, "How did you get yourself into this?"

Knowing he was assigned to a difficult class, I tried to offer moral support. "Are you okay?" I asked. "Can I help?"

He lifted his head and replied, "I’ll be fine as soon as I get this kid out of his locker."

7 votes

CATEGORY School Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "stee" |
$50.00 won 7 votes
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Q: What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall?

A: "Dam."

7 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "ajokes" |