Best Jokes

$50.00 won 16 votes

A U.S. Navy destroyer stops four Mexicans in a row boat rowing towards California. The captain gets on the loud-hailer and shouts, "Ahoy, small craft. Where are you headed?"

One of the Mexicans puts down his oar, stands up, and replies, "We are invading the United States of America to reclaim the territory taken by the USA during the 1800s."

The entire crew of the destroyer doubled-over in laughter. When the captain was finally able to catch his breath, he gets back on the loud-hailer and asks, "Just the four of you?"

The same Mexican stands up again and shouts, "No, we're the last four. The rest are already there!"

16 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "srinu" |
$12.00 won 15 votes
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Doctor: You're in good health. You'll live to be 80.

Patient: But, doctor, I am 80 right now.

Doctor: See, what did I tell you.

15 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "mickey" |
$25.00 won 15 votes

Doctor: We need to get these people to a hospital!

Nurse: What is it?

Doctor: It's a big building with a lot of doctors, but that's not important now!

15 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "mickey" |
$15.00 won 15 votes

Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the only doctor delivering a baby.

“I can’t leave,” the doctor says. “But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.”

The guy runs back to his friend, who is in agony. “What did the doctor say?” the victim cries.

“He says you’re gonna die.”

15 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "Mounika" |