Best Jokes

$9.00 won 9 votes

"Jake," said his employer, "you've done a lot of good things since you've been here. I'm going to increase your pay five dollars a week."

"Thanks boss," replied Jake. "Would you mind putting that in writing?"

"Why? Don't you trust me?"

"I trust you boss," replied Jake. "It's my wife. If I say I got a five dollar raise, she will think it's really fifteen. I just need proof."

9 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "barber7796" |
$25.00 won 9 votes
 

I’m giving up drinking until Christmas!

Sorry, bad punctuation.

I’m giving up, drinking until Christmas!

9 votes

Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "Chloe2015" |
$12.00 won 9 votes

At a local gun show two guys were bragging about their wife's abilities.

"My wife's a fine shot. She can hit a dollar every time."

"That's nothing. My wife goes through my trousers and never misses a dime."

9 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "Benjones" |
9 votes

I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman…

“Mr. Cook?”

“Yes,” I replied.

“I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.”

I said, “That’s not possible, my dog doesn’t have a bike.”

9 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "Vishal" |