Best Jokes

$15.00 won 2 votes

During the ‘rush hour’ at Houston’s Hobby Airport, a flight was delayed due to a mechanical problem.

Since they needed the gate for another flight, the aircraft was backed away from the gate while the maintenance crew worked on it. The passengers were then told the new gate number, which was some distance away.

Everyone moved to the new gate, only to find a third gate had been designated for them. After some further shuffling, everyone got on board, and as they were settling in, the flight attendant made the standard announcement

"We apologize for the inconvenience of this last-minute gate change. This flight is going to Washington, D.C. If your destination is not Washington, D.C., then you should exit the plane at this time."

A very confused-looking and red-faced pilot emerged from the cockpit, carrying his bags. "Sorry," he said, "wrong plane."

2 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "merk" |
$9.00 won 2 votes

Billy: Being a kid is tough. Parents hold mistakes over your head forever. This Friday I can’t go to the movies because I made a simple mistake a long time ago.

Bobby: What did you do?

Billy: I put the hose in my sister’s window and turned it on.

Bobby: That’s a pretty big mistake, when did you do that?

Billy: Wednesday.

2 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Marty" |
$6.00 won 2 votes
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I had just become a Second lieutenant in The Marines when my mother and I were walking toward the Iwo Jima monument. We were about to cross the street when a truck was coming toward us. We jumped back out of the way.

The driver, a USMC Gunny Sergeant slowed down, leaned out the window, saluted and told mother, "Don't worry, I wouldn't hit an officer -- there's too much paperwork in it."

2 votes

CATEGORY Military Jokes
Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "Retired Terp" |
2 votes

A customer was really hassling an airline agent at the ticket counter, yelling and using foul language. However, the agent was polite, pleasant and smiled while the customer continued to abuse her.

When the man finally left, the next person in line said to the agent, "Does that happen often? I can't believe how nice you were to him."

The agent smiled and said, "No problem, I took care of it. He's going to Detroit. His bags are going to Bangkok."

2 votes

CATEGORY Airplane Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |