Best Jokes

Claude, the invisible man, was low on funds and started job prospecting. His employment agency called him into their office with a job opportunity.

"I think this would be a great job for you," said the counselor. "A mirror salesman."

"I don't know," Claude replied. "I just can't see myself doing that."

What did the shark say to the clam when it would not share its candy?

Why are you so shellfish?

Q: What's the difference between being in prison and being a corporate employee?
A: In prison you get free health care.

A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17."

The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Every hand went up.

The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying.