Best Jokes

First Student: "Great Scott! I've forgotten who wrote 'Ivanhoe'?"

Second Student: "I'll tell you if you tell me who the dickens wrote 'A Tale of Two Cities'?"

I sometimes just make my coffee with Red Bull instead of water...

Ironically when I do, I get halfway to work before I realize I left my car at home.

If a young woman is in court for stealing...

Is that a miss-trial?

Conversation between a guy and a salesperson during the new Tesla roadster drive test...

"Excuse me, sir, I see on the specs that the new Tesla roadster comes standard with a defibrillator?"

"Are you ready to hear the price?"