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Favorite this joke A Polish man moved to the United States and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well — until one day he rushed into a lawyer’s office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him. The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:
Lawyer: "Have you any grounds?"
Man: "Yes, an acre and a half and a nice little home."
Lawyer: "No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
Man: "It’s made of concrete."
Lawyer: "I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?"
Man: "No, we have a carport."
Lawyer: "I mean, what are your relations like?"
Man: "All my relations are still in Poland."
Lawyer: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
Man: "We have a high-fidelity stereo and good DVD player."
Lawyer: "Does your wife beat you up?"
Man: "No, I always wake up before her."
Lawyer: "Sir, exactly why do you want this divorce?"
Man: "She's going to kill me."
Lawyer: "What makes you think that?"
Man: "I have proof."
Lawyer: "What kind of proof?"
Man: "She is going to poison me. She bought a bottle and put it on the shelf in the bathroom. I can read it and it says ... 'Polish remover.' "
A girl says to a salesman, "I'm not sure if I should buy a sweatshirt or a windbreaker."
He says, "Well, that depends. Are you gonna sweat, or are you gonna break wind?"
I was just having a conversation with someone who is about to buy a Mac computer. I was against it and an argument started.
I said there were too few people supporting the Mac.
He responded, "When was the last time you heard of a virus on a Mac?"
And I said, "See, even people who write viruses don't support Macs!"
Billy: I want to be an information broker when I grow up.
Bobby: What information do you have?
Billy: Well....um...
Bobby: That's what I thought, without information all you can be is broker.
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