Best Jokes

Why is it quite impossible to starve in the desert?

Because you can always enjoy the sand which is there.

Christmas is in my heart twelve months a year...

And thanks to credit cards, it's on my Visa card statement twelve months a year also.

Did you hear about the Orange who lost his seat to a Tangerine?

He should have Satsuma...

Mrs. Smith needed to have her piano tuned so she asked a friend for a recommendation. She then made an appointment with the piano tuner, Mr. Opperknockity. He arrived two days later, tuned the piano satisfactorily, and left.

Shortly after that, Mrs. Smith noticed that the piano was terribly out of tune again. She called the tuner to complain about it and to ask for a return visit to solve the problem.

However, the tuner replied, "I'm sorry ma'am, but Opperknockity only tunes once!"